rustypants speaks

i made the mistake of trying on a pair of these ugly things tonight

and now i need a pair.

check them out.

it’s @bhalpin’s fault.

about a month ago, he wrote about his top 100 novels, a response to someone’s response to NPR’s list. i’ve looked over others’ lists (including the Modern Library’s and the BBC’s from several years ago) and thought, “well, if they’re doing it, and Halpin’s doing it, i ought to do it, too.”

my list, in no particular order, includes books (not just novels) that have had an impact on me over the last 25+ years, whether because of subject matter, writing style, the time at which i read it, or the chemical that is released by the brain associating pleasure with certain things.

1. Dandelion Wine by Ray Bradbury
2. Winesburg, Ohio by Sherwood Anderson
3. Shadow Country by Peter Matthiessen
4. The Stand by Stephen King
5. Harvest Home by Thomas Tryon
6. Galapagos by Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.
7. An American Tragedy by Ted Dreiser
8. The Martian Chronicles by Ray Bradbury
9. The Inferno by Dante (Ciardi)
10. The Remains of the Day by Kazuo Ishiguro
11. The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
12. Lord of the Flies by William Golding
13. The Hobbit by JRR Tolkien
14. The Lord of the Rings by JRR Tolkien
15. The Talisman by Peter Straub & Stephen King
16. His Dark Materials by Phillip Pullman
17. A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess
18. Harry Potter Series by JK Rowling
19. Chronicles of Narnia by CS Lewis
20. A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini
21. The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood
22. Danny, Champion of the World by Roald Dahl
23. Fox in Socks by Dr. Seuss
24. Maus by Art Spiegelman
25. John Adams by David McCullough
26. Truman by David McCullough
27. Animal Farm by George Orwell
28. Big Fish by Daniel Wallace
29. Leaves of Grass by Walt Whitman
30. angela’s ashes by Frank McCourt
31. The Rise of Theodore Roosevelt by Edmund Morris
32. A Series of Unfortunate Events by lemony snicket
33. Canticle for Leibowitz by Walter Miller
34. Falling Up by Shel Silverstein
35. Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes
36. The Traveler by john twelve hawks
37. The Bible
38. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
39. Snow Falling on Cedars by David Gunderson
40. Contact by Carl Sagan
41. What is the What byDave Eggars
42. Persepolis by Marjane Satrapi
43. Calvin and Hobbes – Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat by Bill Watterson
44. A Generous Orthodoxy by Brian Mclaren
45. Alexander and the Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day by Judith Viorst
46. night by Elie Wiesel
47. extremely loud and incredibly close by Jonathan Safran Foer
48. Candide by Voltaire
49. The Unabridged Edgar Allen Poe
50. The Stories of Ray Bradbury by Ray Bradbury
51. A Bright Red Scream by Marilee Strong
52. The Search to Belong by Joseph Meyers
53. The Scandal of the Evangelical Mind by Mark Noll
54. The Hot Zone by Richard Preston
55. Timeline by Michael Crichton
56. The Big Book of Hell by Matt Groening

fifty-six. it was the best i could do. i wanted to BS a few more classics just to look more cultured and civilized, but then i realized, “hey! this is MY LIST! if someone thinks i’m not all that intelligent because i like dr. seuss, well pbbbbthhhh!”

do you have a list? how about a top three?

follow my play-by-play of the presidential debate on twitter:

http://twitter.com/rustypants

or don’t.

cheech and chong are back together.

the only line from any of their movies that i can remember is:

“aren’t you jerry garcia from the grateful dead?”

given the change in society since their last act (30 years ago?), are these guys even relevant anymore?

heard about the new browser from google? it’s in beta right now and i’m giving it a run. it’s intriguing at this point and it gives me a couple reasons to consider it over firefox (my browser of choice for many years now).

here’s a good article about it in the washington post.

here’s the link to download the beta version.

here’s google’s cool comic book format explaining why you should switch (and the specifics on the technology behind the browser).

how can i help??

www.worldbreastfeedingweek.org

if i can’t contribute can i…

oy vey. inappropriate.

we were busy beavers today.

pensacola chamber of commerce gave us a phone book.

verizon wireless told us we can’t add a third line with a pensacola number and two cincinnati numbers.

we got a bit lost.

we called about a house across the street from my new school.

i met my new principal (he’s quite cool).

i saw my classroom (unflatteringly pictured at right).

i signed my contract.

we lunched with the principal at the new yorker deli (if you visit pensacola, it’s worth the trip – unless you live in new york).

we got an apartment.

we’re officially residents – we have a pensacola address now.

we went to maria’s seafood market, grabbed some jumbo shrimp, had it steamed, crossed the bridge and went to pensacola beach.

sat on the beach (flatteringly pictured at left) and looked back at the past couple years, ate delicious shrimp, watched the sunset, stuck our toes in the water, grabbed a couple seashells and were content.

today we’ve more to do, not the least of which is to…

celebrate Lise’s birthday! woo-woo!

more later.

we’re on the road again monday morning for pensacola – we’ve a thousand things to do down there, including:

• signing my contract / meeting my principal / fingerprinting
• visiting two or three schools that are still hiring art teachers – lise’s going to work on getting her foot in the door and see how things look for getting a position in the district.
• finding the apartment complex we’re looking to rent from starting in August, filling out paperwork and writing too large of a check.
• stopping in on the school district offices and getting some final information before school starts next month.
• visiting the chamber of commerce for more moving information and area details
• hitting the beach in the evenings for sunsets, strolls, and sea shell hunting.
• going to joe patti’s seafood and loading up before we leave for cincinnati thursday morning.
• celebrating lise’s 39th birthday wednesday july 11th!! woo-woo!! want to send her a note? email her at liserust at gmail.com

for now, however, i expect my thoughts will soon be wandering the way they always do when i’m ridin’ sixteen hours and there’s nothin’ much to do. we’ll survive somehow.

it should be no surprise to anyone that my favorite show of all time is The Simpsons – nevermind that it’s been on for 18 years, it’s still clever, biting social commentary on a broad cross-section of American life. i can’t get enough of it.

now that the simpson’s movie is weeks away from release, i’ve given in and become a pawn in the game.

i’ve wanted for years to have a caricature done in the likeness of groening’s creations – it was worth the wait.

one thing i’ve always enjoyed about the show is their willingness to offend anyone and everyone – christians, muslims, hindus, whites, blacks, jews, gay, straight, men, women – nothing is sacred (and thank goodness).

i occasionally meet folks who are offended by the portrayal of God / Jesus / Christians in the show but i look again at the point: non-christians look at us and THINK WE REALLY ARE LIKE THIS or that we believe this or that about God! it’s a caricature of the real thing, a stereotype – but it’s what people think.

and if it takes a cartoon to offend us, make us step back and say, “geez – do i really (act / think / believe) this way? is this what people see when they see me?” then i’m all for it.

want your own Simpson’s likeness? www.simpsonsmovie.com – click on the section about making your own avatar and have fun!

7-11 turns stores into kwik-e-marts – promo for new simpsons movie.

hee hee!!

we had a fun-filled visit to maryland last week.

we got to see a lot of good friends. ate crabs. stayed up late talking. played cards.

dolby got to hang out with his old friend, Ace. they got into some wonderful fights and rough playing over dolby’s toys (Ace won 98% of the arguments because he’s just a smooth and cool dog – dolby’s not refined enough yet).

and now i offer the pictures to you. enjoy. or not.

drive together in perfect harmony?

we got lise a new car today. pretty little 2003 Saturn Ion with 28,000 miles on it in excellent shape and taken very good care of by previous owner. her old 2000 Saturn SL2 has 156,000 miles and, while it’s been very dependable, i’ve been concerned about moving 1,000 miles away from her family and her obvious desire to visit as often as possible. this was my solution.

so my black ion, her white ion, living together in perfect harmony.

my car’s name is Shaniqua (because she’s black and beautiful). i’ve suggested that lise name her car something like bob. or jim. or steve. we’ll see.

are things like

waterdeep coming out with their first album in years.

…

today in maryland

while lise and i were out acting strange with old (young) friends…

(pretending to catch flies?)

(imitating a cat throwing up?)

(doing a bill the cat impersonation?)

…

dolby sat at home and wondered…

…

will they ever be back??

…

and don’t they WUV ME???

today, after my saying something stupid, the following exchange took place:

me: “why do you bother keeping me around? it doesn’t make any sense to me.”

lise: “i figure, ‘it’s extra income.’”

much has been going on lately (like, duh) = it’s time to stop and process some of the muck accumulating in the crevices of my brain. sit tight and read on:

• the house has been up for eight days now and we’ve not gotten a single call. am i freaked? am i worried? naw. not yet. we knew this was gonna be a tough row to hoe when we set out to sell. the market is poor and there’s a glut of houses in cheviot / cincinnati up for sale – some better, many worse than our nifty little place.
• i’ve got my first interview this thursday with the principal of a school in pensacola – much excitement, obviously!
• lise’s been in toledo for a couple days visiting with her mom. a good visit was had and she’s all rested, relaxed and ready to hit maryland for a couple days.
• my wife = pure awesome. even with my mom’s finger up her nose.
• we leave for maryland later this morning for what will likely be our last trip there for a while. from cincy to maryland, it’s 550 miles. from cincy to pensacola it’s 750 miles. from pensacola to maryland it’s 1000 miles. zowie! but we’re not focusing on that – we’re looking forward to hanging with barb & joe plus seeing many of our kids from youth groups past. it’s gonna be a great time.
• and speaking of youth group kids: when did i give them permission to get jobs, get married, move away, start families, etc?? i thought they were supposed to stay 16 forever? hee hee. the truth is, this is where a lot of the fruit of ministry is seen – to watch them take the foundational things laid in years past and put them to work as adults – priceless, dudes, priceless.
• i’m almost finished with the book Wicked – and i liiike it! my friend amanda calls it her favorite book and she loaned me her copy. it was one of those books that you take, flip through, get discombobulated by big words, confusing names, unknown places and decide, “i’ll lie and tell her i started reading it, didn’t like it, and am just giving it back” but then… yeah, i decided to read two chapters, just so i wouldn’t have to lie. next thing i know, it’s 4/5 of the way through the book and i’m wondering how it’ll end!
• new tunes i’ve been listening to & like: sarah carr told me to check out augustana and snow patrol, so i did. they’re both pretty good, but i’m leaning towards augustana. chris brown’s self-titled album is pretty cool. alan parsons put an album out a couple years ago i just recently got called A Valid Path. a techno-alan-parsons? veddy iiinterestink!
• new tunes that aren’t impressing me: joss stone (borrring). john legend. acoustic alchemy (Zzzzzzzz…).
• new tunes i WANT SO BAD TO LIKE and i DON’T HATE but…: ry cooder’s My Name Is Buddy. hearing cooder do dustbowl-like tunes is… i dunno. i just dunno.
• i get shocked every other day or so when i realize: we’re moving the last week of july to pensacola. that’s 4-5 weeks away! holy CRAP! people to see, family to hang with, things to pack, apartment to find and rent, people to say goodbye to – we’ve been so busy getting the house ready that the time has just flown by.

if you’re in the area, please make it a point to holler at us and lets get together before we go!

and now, it’s almost 2am. sleep is welcome.

g’night.

one thing i don’t talk about much is the age of our house (81 years) and the joy of some of the architectural features found inside.

when we first bought this place, there were many things that needed to be replaced or fixed or just plain thrown out. the wiring is a brittle cloth romex – wires covered in cloth. the panel in the basement was a vintage 1927 fusebox with three different boards and no central switch. the light fixtures in the ceilings are architectural antiques and (in my opinion) are butt-ugly. among the things that needed to be replaced were some light switches that were ancient and scary. i had a great time with several of the switches, but when it came to the one in the bedroom, i didn’t know what to do.

it sparked. it worked. usually.

it clicked LOUD. LOUD!

i bought a switch, popped the plate off, and couldn’t figure out what had exploded inside. what a mess! the switch was like nothing i’d ever seen before, and to top it off, the previous folks had plastered around it, so you couldn’t even get the thing out (if you even knew where to start!!) – i was at a loss, and was spooked.

i put the plate back on, prayed that the thing wouldn’t spark a fire (and with cloth-covered wiring)…

well, this sucker finally gave up the ghost about a month ago. we resorted to using the bedside lamps instead of messing with the switch, and i swore i’d figure out a way to get that thing out of the wall and replace it.

thank gosh for uncle ken.

this guy is the king of old houses – he and aunt sharon lived for decades in what used to be a mid-1800’s one room school house in Milford – he’d done everything you can imagine to keep up, replace, fix, and renovate this old place.

he and sharon were in town last week and they came over to the house – i snagged him part way through the party and asked him to take a look at the switch. 15 seconds later he’s hammering at the plaster around it, yanking on crumbling old wires, tugs, pulls, and asks me if i’ve got a new switch. dashing madly, i find the replacement, bring the needed tools, hit the circuit to turn off the current, and next thing i know, he pulls what you see in the pictures above out of the wall.

it’s one of the simplest switches i’ve ever seen, housed in a ceramic base. never seen anything like it before. the reason it wasn’t working was that the ceramic base cracked in two and the connection wasn’t being made with the terminal.

oh, but the joy of owning an older home.

check out the house listing.

and please call if you’re wanting to buy a charming home in Cincinnati.

or putting it up – one of the two.

after months of preparation and work, the house is finally listed and up for sale. mike, our realtor, came by yesterday, took pictures, put finishing touches on the contract, got the last of the information we needed, signed here, initialed there, and we were set. as a free service, he reminded us of what we’re getting ourselves into – both an encouragement and a warning, given the current market.

but we ain’t worried about it.

yet.

we’re hoping for a quick sale at the price we’re asking, but we’re not really putting any hardcore expectations on it and not getting excited about the possibility. we’ve rolled with everything so far, there’s no sense in stopping that mindset now.

it’s a funny thing: through all this work on the house, we honestly didn’t realize how beat up the place was. chipped paint, bad paint, old fixtures, caked on dust and dirt, grime, grease, non-working parts, etc. – we were so happy to have the place at all that we didn’t notice the stuff. now that we’ve completely redone the appearance of much of the inside/outside, it looks better than it ever has.

i’ve put some pictures up of how things look now – feel free to browse and make comments.

i expected to be much more melancholy about the whole thing than i am – we’re so relaxed and at peace about this move to pensacola that it’s an unusual sensation to be just completely chill about it all.

many thanks to family and friends who have been so supportive – helping us paint, wallpaper, clean, encouraging us each step of the way.

“Thousands of people have written to tell me that I am wrong not to believe in God. The most hostile of these communications have come from Christians. This is ironic, as Christians generally imagine that no faith imparts the virtues of love and forgiveness more effectively than their own. The truth is that many who claim to be transformed by Christ’s love are deeply, even murderously, intolerant of criticism. While we may want to ascribe this to human nature, it is clear that such hatred draws considerable support from the Bible. How do I know this? The most disturbed of my correspondents always cite chapter and verse.”

Thoughts?

• i’ve been up and down and all around this past week emotionally. i hate riding the rollercoaster.
• lise and i have finished the applications for escambia county, florida, school system and the florida teacher certification – now we’re waiting for recommendation letters, college transcripts and other necessary stuff to go through and give us the green light.
• there are currently about 25 special ed positions open internally at escambia – these positions will be made public around june.
• working with emotionally disturbed kids has sucked me dry this past year. too much psychology and not enough academics. i’m screwed up enough on my own and deal with enough of my own demons than to try and remain calm and objective with these kids. even if we don’t end up in pensacola this summer, this HAS to be my last school year in an ED / SBH setting. at least for a little while.
• Xavier is going well but killing me at the same time. it’s too much stuff in the face of all these other things going on. i’m not sleeping well, i’m not eating well, i’m not getting enough time with my mom, my dad, my wife, i’m overwhelmed with paperwork for the move, with getting the house ready, with worrying about what decisions we’re going to have to make if we can’t get this house listed and sold in enough time before the school year starts in florida (august 9), the grass isn’t getting cut, and the dog is depressed. i’m worn out and having a problem giving a damn about grad school. keeping the important things at the top has been a losing battle.
• the basement is starting to look a bit better. i’ve been having fun with hydraulic cement, dryloc paint and a 5 gallon bucket of drywall. once i got one wall done and painted, i was floored. i’m only sorry that i waited so long to do it. we weren’t really paying attention to it since we moved in – we just love our house.
• dad came over and wallpapered the hallway this past week and holy crap – it looks really good!! when i came home and saw the finished job i was thinking, “daanng! maybe we need to wallpaper the whole damn house!” dad, however, vetoed that idea.
• we took a number of movies (about an hour’s worth) of the beach and the waves down in pensacola so we could play them whenever we needed to be transported back – it’s been fun watching and dreaming about it.
• the iPod has 8182 songs loaded. top songs? eva cassidy’s cover of “Field of Dreams” – the grateful dead’s “Brokedown Palace” and dido’s “Here With Me” – honorable mentions include norah jones, kt tunstall, jonny lang, natalie merchant, dave matthews and bruce springsteen (his “Nebraska” album is stunning in comparison with some of his sillier “Born In The USA”-era stuff).
• we recently rented “Stranger Than Fiction” and it was quite captivating. the concept and the idea behind the movie as well as the different perspectives of the characters (“life happens then you die – get used to it” – “yeah, but it’s MY LIFE!!”) and the hilarious narration of the main character’s life (and his response to hearing the narration) – well, only a few movies have caught me like this: Being John Malkovich; Fight Club; Eyes Wide Shut; A.I.; Vanilla Sky; The Fisher King; 12 Monkeys – these are just a few examples. highly recommended movie. if i have the mental wherewithall, i’ll post a bit more about it later. we bought the movie. i had to have it.
• i’ve gotten several hits over the last month from people searching for information on the FTCE – the Florida Teacher Certification Exam – most of the search strings include something along the lines of “is it easy” – my answer (because i don’t really give it in my earlier post about it) is: it depends.
• i’m a very good test taker and the test is multiple choice – elimination of two obvious non-answers was easy for me – i took both the K-6 and the ESE exams and passed both.
• however, i’ve also been in education in one form or another for the last 16 years – there was much in the test that wasn’t real difficult if you’ve been around good teachers and good practices – i’ve been very fortunate to have been taught by the best
• ALSO, i’ve got an undergrad degree in youth ministry (read: teaching) and 18 grad credits at xavier university in special education.
• BE WARNED: if you don’t have a background in phonics and foundations of literacy, you’re going to be hurting. both the FTCE K-6 and the FTCE ESE (education of students with exceptionalities) were LOADED with questions regarding literacy, reading and writing processes and phonics education – good books to catch up with in this area include Phonics They Use and Writer’s Workshop – both of these books address most of the literacy questions you’ll encounter.
• i did not study for the exam – i took a practice test on both of them and decided to go into it blind – i don’t study well for wide-ranging tests like this. i DID, however, buy a study guide (but didn’t use it) and can recommend one in particular: FTCE (REA) by anne price davis. the other helps i saw out there pale in comparison. it’s also better than the $5 test booklet you can get from the state. in fact, i’d say the state test prep book is a waste – it tells you the principles you need to know but doesn’t teach them to you – this book does.
• feel free to contact me at youthdude at gmail.com and ask me specific questions.
• as per my usual streams of consciousness, it’s late and i’m dead. g’night.

of 700+ pictures taken in pensacola, a couple of them have been posted for viewing.

for some stunning sunsets, scroll down towards the bottom – spectacular show – first two days down there the sunsets were marginal but then the full moon rose behind us, then two later days the sunsets blew our minds! all part of the reason our pensacola ritual involves being on the beach every night as the sun goes down. zow!

i’ve managed to put a couple pics up from our time in pensacola.

they’re small and may not look perfect, but be patient – i can only do so much with my little pocket pc.

well, our first real disappointment in the move to florida has hit over the last two days. it’s not a roadblock, it’s just a bump.

we looked at houses yesterday and today and things are gonna take a bit longer and require more patience than we thought. while it’s a buyers market here in the area, what the buyer has to choose from is less than exciting. houses are all very similar in appearance and not well kept up (at least in the area we looked and within our pricerange). we’re gonna end up with less house for the money but with a lot more property than we’re used to.

we’re keeping an open mind and aren’t in a HUGE hurry to find something we love anyway – couldn’t afford two mortgages even if we could get approved for another one.

despite this disappointment, we had a great day. got to see more of the area, bought a tiki, sat for a BEAUTIFUL sunset and just had a great time.

insane day in florida today. met with the teacher recruiter for escambia county, florida – we thought it was going to be a 45 minute meeting with him to get basic information and introduce ourselves, etc. and it turned out to take all afternoon with lise meeting the art dept chair, i met one of the folks from the special ed dept, we met and talked with certification dept people and personnel folks – the bottom line?
i was told that i get to write my own ticket 9as far as what i want to teach in special ed, and lise was told that there are 12 positions currently open in the art dept.
and we were encouraged, met with much friendly and helpful attitudes and told to come on down – jobs are here for us.

how do we feel?

overwhelmed, to say the least. excited, too. this definitely made things more real than ever. and more scary.

or defeeted.

spent the last two days in pittsburgh taking the FTCE – the Florida Teacher Certification Exam for K-6 and for ESE – Education of Students with Exceptionalities – and passed both of em! HUGE amounts of stress were lifted and total relief when that last test was done and i saw i had made it through!

so, looks like we’re gonna have to move to florida now. :-)

dog tired from the tests, the accompanying insomnia, the drive home and then class this evening. i need some rest.

oh! and besides passing the tests, i got to hang out with kristen farley all last night!! woo-woo!! sadly, no pictures to post, but memories to last a loong time!

our good friend hannah came over tuesday

and she has the longest toes of any person i know.

dead tired. long days. much work. mental stress. warm pillow. soft blanket. sweet sleep. sweeet sleeeep…. zzzzZZZZZZ, er, hmm… zzzz… uh, isn’t there a paper due in 4 weeks for your class? you’re being lazy and not doing the research right. and you always do the research wrong. remember that one paper you wrote 5 years ago for that one class? you did it all wrong. and now you’re doing this one wrong. and you always do them wrong. forever. for 38 years you do them wrong. wrong. that’s a funny word. it has it’s origins in Middle English, about 900 years ago. i wonder what it was like to live 900 years ago before all the modern conveniences we have today. would i get the black death and suffer horribly? death. hm. i wonder what it’ll be like to die. i hope i don’t drown. drowning is my worst dream. remember that one time you were swimming and someone tried to pull you under the water – gah! there’s the feeling in my stomach now, the panic and fear. panic. panic room. that was an interesting movie. forrest whitaker was in that – he was one of the bad guys. he won best actor last week. he should have won for his role in Clint Eastwood’s “Bird” several years ago. Bird. i prefer john coltrane. bird was a good horn player, but coltrane – there was more intensity. love supreme is one of the best albums i own. and the song he wrote the poem for and played the notes to the cadence of the poem… what was the name of that song… it’s the last song on love supreme… crap. i can’t remember. doxology? prayer? offering? offering. a nice album by third day, but then commercially exploited with too many sequel albums. i think they jumped the shark with that album. haha. jump the shark. i don’t think i’d want to do that…

insomnia is something i’ve lived with for years. i don’t say “suffered with” for a reason. insomnia is a bitch – don’t get me wrong: the above dialogue could easily run through my head any given night, keeping me from sweet sleep (and this is only the beginning – it’s like a mental manic run that seemingly never ends with connections pulled out of the sky, key words that provoke more words and new streams that run into some strange valleys and once you’ve started the run… settle in! the ride won’t be over until dawn…) but insomnia has a way of making me feel strangely… alive.

haha. alive. even as the next day (week? month?) i feel dead in some senses, there’s a certain… joy? no. happiness? no. perverse alertness? yes! hyperdrive! mania! adrenaline rush! it’s like a natural high, almost.

almost.

insomnia is exhausting, yet i’ve never taken steps to avoid it, really. i don’t take pills. i don’t take my dad’s suggestions. i don’t do what my mom does or take the natural supplements she gave me to sleep soundly. i don’t mention it to my doctor. i bitch about it when it gets really bad (read: weeks and weeks) but that hyperdrive, racing mind, inability to shut down my brain – it’s a very creative time for me (although physical or tactile output is minimal). the creativity is mental. exploration of avenues, creativity in projects, objective thinking (and not so objective thinking) all comes out of these sleepless spells.

so why do i bore you with all this?

washington post BookWorld editor Dennis Drabelle contributes an article in today’s edition that looks at insomnia and creativity with a tantalizing peek at research into the subject.

it certainly doesn’t help my insomnia, but then why would i want help? my insomnia is a part of me and has been a part of me for a long time. i’d be pretty lonely without it.

and no, it’s not me with my pants down.

the moon is full and i’ve had this crazy notion (haha, get it??) to go out and shoot the moon (hee hee!! i’m so funny!!) while it’s nice and round with the new digital camera.

so at 1am last night, out i go, bundled up, tripod and camera in hand, going for a picture of the moon. and the result is impressive, if you ask me.

i’ve been shooting this thing in a lot of different settings and have to say that i’m now spoiled. for the money, this is a great camera with much flexibility and versatility.

amazon.com has them cheap – you ought to get one.

with the return of former president charles logan to 24 last night my brain locked up, i began stuttering, drooling and raving like a lunatic.

lise came over, slapped me in the face numerous times and eventually had to throw a glass of ice water in my face to stop the conniption.

and thank goodness she did. i was heading down a mental path of no return.

my new mantra?

it’s just a show. it’s just a show. it’s just a show. it’s just a show.

snow day number two.

oh yeah, dude.

and the icing on the cake?

xavier is closed, too.

*does silly cha-cha dance*

mama always warned us about eating the yellow snow.

but did we listen?

nooOOOOOOoooooooo…

here’s what’s been floating around my small brain recently:

• lise and i bought a new digital camera this past week. we’d been considering buying a cheap-o $100 camera that we could throw in the glove compartment so we wouldn’t miss “the shot” (which we’ve done several times). our samsung a7 has served us very well, but it’s been our “good camera” and we don’t want it to get busted up. after 2 months of research into dozens of digital cameras, i came to the conclusion that buying a $100 cheap-o would be a waste. for $250 we could get a good digital camera and make the a7 our cheap-o. and we did just that. picked up a Canon PowerShot S2 IS – essentially last year’s model – and we are completely blown away by the quality of this camera, the versatility of the features and the pictures (and VIDEO!) it takes. the 12X optical zoom is simply amazing as well as the SuperMacro feature for close-up shots. fantastic camera and highly recommended!
• on that note, we spent the day yesterday driving around, spending MUCH needed time together and taking pictures in the frigid frigid air around town. we hit fountain square, mt. adams and finally the krohn conservatory. of the 140 shots we took, 28 are available for your viewing pleasure. knock yourself out. we did!
• things have been difficult 3 of the last 4 weeks or so. not sure if this is my usual cycle of going through a rough patch of depression every 9 months or so or what, but it sucked. things started looking up last week and it helps. helps the job, helps grad school, helps at home – it’s hard when things just suck. outlook on everything gets skewed.
• lise and i have been battling what i can only call complacency, defined here as: a feeling of quiet pleasure or security, often while unaware of some potential danger, defect, or the like; self-satisfaction or smug satisfaction with an existing situation, condition, etc. – not a good thing. i’ll be sharing more over the coming weeks, but we’ve decided to look into moving to pensacola, florida. something’s got to change in a huge and radical way, because our zombie-like, keeping our heads above the water, just-getting-through-the-day, no goals or real desires except to say we made it through another horrible day attitudes aren’t flying any more. we’ve hooked up with a realtor down there, and will be doing a lot of phone calling / web research before we head down there for a week over spring break. we’re getting in touch with our realtor here to assess the situation and are generally getting excited about the possibilities. and that excitement is the first we’ve experienced about something in a long time. the last 3+ years have been a nightmare on so many different levels. it’s time we took some control over all this and start fighting. pensacola may be the catalyst.
• i’ve fallen in love with peppermint tootsie pops. if you know where i can get them (or you want to send some to me) please let me know. they’ve disappeared from this area (and i never really knew where to get them to begin with – they were given to me by my friend amanda).
• the ipod now contains 7487 songs and over 600 CD’s. recent discoveries or re-discoveries include: ray lynch’s deep breakfast – an album i heard back in high school on NPR’s new age program. it didn’t age well, but it has brought back memories. kenny wayne shepherd’s 10 days out – holy crap – this is an incredible album! blues, son! blistering, incredible, back-room blues! eva cassidy’s songbird album – i’ve never heard of this woman before but on the recommendation of my barber i got it – and am i ever glad. i’ve been on a girl-rock kick here recently (according to lise – including KT Tunstall, Norah Jones, Dido, Neko Case, among others) and eva cassidy had a great vocal style. last but not least, ray lamontagne’s trouble. i don’t know how this one got away from me 2 years ago when it came out. hard to describe the music but it’s folksy-bluesy-???
• dad and karen took a cruise through the panama canal this past week with stops in various places along the way and back, including haiti. when asked if there was anything we’d like from any of these places, lise asked for a cabana boy and i requested a blood-borne pathogen. they have returned, claiming a wonderful trip, but without either of our two requests. what’re we to do? how do we get our cabana boy and blood-borne pathogen needs met??
• it’s late. i’m tired. hope you’re all well. do feel free to comment any of these items or all of them if you feel adventurous.

…just good music.

there are few things i enjoy more in life than getting to watch and listen to good musicians enjoying the time they have making music and jamming out together. albums like Jimmy Smith’s The Sermon, Buddy Miles’ Live ‘71, Grateful Dead (name any live bootleg), Keith Jarrett Trio (any live album) – these all make me smile because you can feel the energy the musicians have together – and they’re GOOD!

and tonight, the red hot chili peppers got added to that list.

their albums are good – no doubt. but there are bands who can’t translate from the studio to a live setting very well. there are other bands who translate it TOO well and create over-produced, over-choreographed, waay-too-slick concerts that i would have been better off just staying home and listening to the CD. i fear both of these things when it comes to live shows.

so: gnarls barkley opens the show – interesting set. pretty straightforward – good reproduction of the CD – took 15 people on stage to reproduce it but it was cool.

and then. the peppers. holy. crap.

nothing fancy. the huge displays were the only special effects. no backup singers. just a dude playing percussion off to the side on some songs. they launched into a nice set of tunes during which i thought, “crap – they’re just reproducing the CD note for note…”

and then they shut me up.

suddenly, flea and john are the only ones up on stage and they’re doing this sweet jam. and they jam. and they jam some more. and this happened frequently through the rest of the show, eventually ending with the two of them bringing the house down during the encore.

i was surprised, but i wouldn’t have been if i had read up on the RHCP concert experience a bit. Wikipedia’s RHCP article includes the following:

Improvisation has always been a major part of the signature style of the band. Early shows were composed almost entirely of improvisations. As well, many solos recorded on the current albums by guitarist John Frusciante are improvised, and his live solos are almost invariably improvised, as are Flea’s bass solos. The band has, for the better part of the last decade, opened the show with a short improvisation, always on the same key as the initial song. Sometimes the beginnings, middle sections and/or endings of the songs are long extended by improvisations, such as Give it Away.

all this to say: i’d been familiar with the peppers since high school (they started waaay back in 1983) and bought bloodsugarsexmagik when it hit back in the early 90’s, but i didn’t realize what a fantastic, ass-kicking group of musicians they were!

awesome time tonight. hanging out with my friend scott, good dinner with friends of his at Betta’s, great show by the RHCP – good way to spend a saturday night.

GONE!

i’ve always had fun putting together web sites for youth ministries – waaay back in the day (like, 1995) i had put together a webpage containing only pictures of the youth group that almost no one could view (because no one had the internet at home). the next church lise and i were at, the other dude we did the ministry with put together a website with me – i had maintained that for probably 5 years or so. when we came to the last church we did ministry at, i put together www.dunamisyouth.com – we had maintained that for about 3 years by the time we finally left there. i had paid for several years on the domain name and offered to give it to the church / youth group but was told, “no thanks – you can keep it.” so i put a page up saying it was no longer the website for the group, etc. blah blah blah and there it sat for 10 months or so.

fast forward to october 2006. i receive an email from a guy out in california who is working with his church’s youth ministry – their youth group name is DUNAMIS and they were hoping to have a website with that in it to use for information, etc. – would i be interested in selling them the site and the name?

woo-woo! after all that time i can finally do something good with the website again! i was so happy! it was nice to be able to just give it to them knowing it would continue on being a tool for youth ministry.

so when you get a minute (assuming you care or perhaps remember the old dunamis site) check it out.

www.dunamisyouth.com

wanna take a guess who’s gonna be sitting pretty in the club seats at the red hot chili peppers concert here in cincinnati on january 20?

oh, yeah, baby. a birthday present from my bud matt.

now here’s a scary thing: matt and i have known each other since high school – the year before we got out of high school, who released their first album?

um, yeah. RHCP!! woo! still kicking butt after all this time.

the next scary thing? waay back in the day, the RHCP would perform wearing only a single strategically placed tube sock. my suggestion to matt?

i think we ought to go dressed accordingly.

i don’t think he thought i was being serious…

i resolve to not make any new year’s resolutions.

oh, crap. see, i broke it already!

good day today with family and friends. not much new to add to the early-morning ramble but a couple pictures to entertain. hope your day was great, too!

we got some good pics over the last few days of setting up the christmas tree and stringing up the lights.

we also strung Dolby up with lights, too. plugged him in while we were at it. his eyes glowed so well that we were thinking about using him for a tree-topper, but the truth is, trying to get
that top branch up his butt and then getting him to stay up there – that was beyond our abilities.

we had to settle for getting a goofy hat on him. we thought he looked cute.

but his opinion on the matter was different than ours.

it’s christmas day and a very merry christmas to all of you.

so i’ve been asked: Where The Heck Are You?

and the answer: at sharonville elementary, at xavier, at home being a husband!

winter break is upon us and as i’ve not kept up with my writing online, here’s a stream of consciousness for you…

• 11 days off – woowoo!! gosh, i don’t think i’ve needed an 11 day break from life and responsibility like this in a long time!
• special ed continues to rock at sharonville – literally and figuratively. working in the 4th – 5th grade intermediate ED (emotionally disturbed) unit never fails to be cool, frustrating, invigorating and overwhelming. where else can you be hugged, be told you’re someone’s favorite teacher, get called a fatass bastard MF’er, put a kid in the timeout room, write an “agreement” with a kid not to do ___________ (fill in the blank with your favorite bad thing here), eat authentic school cafeteria food and sit in on an IEP meeting and be told you’re not serving someone’s kid appropriately all in the same day?
• first semester of grad school ended wednesday – and not a day too soon. i’m exhausted. is xavier hard? no. is it time consuming? heck yes. the end result looks like this: two definite A’s and a third class that is probably an A; phonics and the foundations of literacy has convinced me to look into changing my major to Reading Specialist; i don’t want to go back for another semester – i’m tired and can’t imagine another three years of this.
• i’ve spoken with several folks about changing my major to Reading and the first comment every time is: well, you’ll never be without a job if you stay with Special Education. my response is: yeah, but i don’t want to do something i’m not going to like – 3-4 YEARS of grad school just to end up in a job that i don’t want to do for the rest of my life…. haha, well, that’s what i did with my undergrad degree. let’s not make the same mistake again.
• and this all leads to insecurity and doubt as i think to myself, “dude – you’re 38 years old – how long are you going to keep screwing around??” how much longer CAN i screw around, really? wouldn’t it be great if i just knew for certain what i wanted to do from this point on?
• so why get out of special ed? being back in special ed for the last year has shown me one thing, if nothing else: programs like No Child Left Behind and the Ohio testing standards screw my kids over, leading to ridiculous pronouncements from the districts like, “all students must be fully included in all their regular education classes” to which i have to SCREAM AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS that THIS DOESN’T WORK FOR ALL STUDENTS YOU STUPID IDIOTS!!!! this is why all special ed kids have INDIVIDUALIZED EDUCATIONAL PROGRAMS (IEP’s) written specially for them!!! my hands get tied when it comes to actually educating kids at their present levels and with my ED kids, who are already struggling emotionally, this adds one more thing for them to feel like shit about.
• the iPod continues to rock my socks. 400+ CD’s loaded, more on the way. truth is, i’ve slowed down a bit to actually LISTEN to some of the new stuff being put on there. latest favorites? well, the cowboy junkies are still up there, along with toad the wet sprocket, natalie merchant, vince guaraldi’s charlie brown christmas album, robert cray’s some rainy morning album, india.arie, leonard bernstein’s beethoven symphonies 2 & 7, sarah mclachlan has also entered the charts along with keith jarrett’s carnegie hall concert.
• our friends amanda and jeff are down in gulf shores alabama and i’m insanely jealous. this time last year we were in pensacola on what was the best vacation we’ve ever had. we had talked about going down again this year but wanted also to be with family and the break wasn’t as long this time. we DO have the condo reserved for the week of spring break in april. it’s one of the only things keeping me sane.
• i’ve got too many books in the queue to read. lise got me lemony snicket’s 13 volume series of unfortunate events, a couple david mccullough non-fictions, frank mccourt’s teacher man, marley and me, through painted deserts, vera, the new stephen king book, and offers of more from others.
• lise and i went and looked at christmas lights tonight. indian hill / madiera = good area to look at lights. we do this every year and it never gets old. we have a very perverted rating system of whether a house gets thumed up or thumbed down. what fun we have!
• lise asked me tonight what i would do with $10,000,000 if we had everything else taken care of and investments in place – what would i spend the money on. i told her i’d find some youth groups in the cincinnati area that need some money and set up some trusts / funds for them, then buy a house on the beach in pensacola, a new Saturn and a kick-ass stereo system.
• dolby went with us tonight to look at lights and let me tell you: being tossed around in the backseat for a couple hours while your owners look at stupid lights on houses = one unhappy dog. note to self: next year, leave the dog at home.
• i wonder, at late hours like this, if dolby would have had more fun if he could see in color instead of only black and white.
• the picture of dolby to the right was taken this past week. the look on his face seems to indicate that he knew he was going to be dragged around tonight and was getting a head start on looking sad.
• a year after leaving the ministry, how have things squared up? well, i do miss the kids and the guys and gals i worked with in the youth ministry team. i miss teaching and sharing the gospel with teenagers who i believe are desperate for answers. i miss the atmosphere. i don’t miss the counseling. i don’t miss the every-night-something-is-going-on feeling. i don’t miss the long weekends. i don’t miss inept leadership on behalf of the rest of the church. i don’t miss playing games in order to get things done. i don’t miss the disgust of dealing with folk who make me ashamed to be a Christian. it’s been more of a relief than i expected, being able to spend more time with lise, get into grad school, not worry about images and the game of corporate Christianity.
• if i could do things over again, what would i do differently? let’s not play that game.
• things are good. i’m exhausted from life, but that’s not always a bad place to be. i tend to go one of two ways – i’m overly busy and thus spend less time obsessing over crap, or i’m not busy enough and start to second-guess everything and wonder why ________________ (fill in the blank with your biggest insecurity or fear here).
• my wife? she rocks. we celebrated 16 years together this month. i’d do it again.

be well and hope you had a wonderful christmas!

… the iPod count as of Friday December 1:

• 3,951 songs loaded
• approximately 300 CD’s
• most played album so far: Lay It Down by The Cowboy Junkies
• followed closely by: Charlie Brown Christmas by the Vince Guaraldi Trio
• CD’s still left to load: approximately 600
• Space taken = 26.6gb (see why i needed the 80gb?)
• latest “much loved / seldom played / somewhat forgotten” gem: Crystal Silence by Chick Corea and Gary Burton
• am i sick of loading tunes yet: DEFINITELY

the Crystal Silence CD is a real sweet number. stunning in it’s delivery of piano / vibes soothing jazz, it’s not like anything you’ll hear on those wussy lite jazz stations. burton is probably the best out there on vibes. corea with his spanish-accented jazz piano weaves in and out of burton. burton weaves through corea. soothing. mellow. intricate. worthy. go listen to some clips on amazon.

so: iPod – was it worth it?

absolutely.

• after months of indecision and second-guessing, i finally broke down and bought an 80gig iPod and oh. my. gosh. what on earth did i ever do before i had this thing? absolutely amazing and wonderful.
• grad school has gotten a bit easier (or maybe i’m just more comfortable with the classes and content now) and while it’s still a lot of reading, writing and time away in class or doing homework, it’s not the horrible stressor it was a couple months ago.
• i love my job. special ed is awesome. there are times when i want to throttle the kids or throw myself out the window to escape the behaviors and frustrations, but doggoneit, i love these kids and i love education. it’s just a blast.
• anyone who is reading this and still wondering, “why did he need an 80gig iPod – why not a 30gig?” obviously hasn’t seen my CD collection or my extensive bootleg concert collection.
• speaking of bootleg concerts, i’ve downloaded some incredible pink floyd and grateful dead concerts over the last couple weeks – it reminds me that as much as i love my CD’s and studio tunes, live music is the way to go!
• we leave tuesday after work to drive to maryland and stay with our friends barb and joe for thanksgiving. dolby’s going to have ace to hump again, we’re going to bask in the glow of missed friends and, of course, there’s always The Drive.
• converting a thousand CD’s to mp3 and then putting them into an iPod is time consuming yet fun. rediscovering tunes that i haven’t listened to in years is a blast. rediscovering some tunes that i’d just as soon not listen to again is amusing, too.
• my favorite book of all time has to be dandelion wine by ray bradbury. 45 years later, the second half of the book is released – Farewell Summer – and i’m sad to report that it’s somewhat disappointing. bradbury is a brilliant writer whose metaphors and imagery have kept me reading for years. this, his followup, is too forced and contrived. instead of writing and letting the metaphors speak for themselves, he has to lay them out and take us through them point by point. the book isn’t awful but it’s certainly nothing like the first half…
• new roof was put on the garage this past friday. new gutters on the house go up this week as well as tuckpointing the chimneys. pretty cool seeing all this stuff getting done. won’t be pretty cool writing a check for thousands of bucks. but the house is lookin good!!
• the who are back with a CD/DVD and a tour. they hit columbus later this month or next month. a friend and i talked about going. the cheap cheap cheap seats? $52. no thanks. i’m wondering why i’d want to pay so much for bad seats to see two of the original four geriatric members play 35 year old songs. nostalgia? naw.
• i love my wife. our sixteenth (16) anniversary is a week away and i can’t imagine spending life with anyone but her. everyone should be so lucky.
• i’ve been wanting a Xavier University sweatshirt. X’s bookstore has ‘em for WAAAY too much money. was introduced to steve and barry’s last night. got a butt-kicking X sweatshirt for $14.98! woo!
• bob newhart is one of my favorite comedians of all time. his timing and expressions are priceless. he’s got a new book out. don’t buy it.
• we found a dog toy company that backs its toys with a LIFETIME GUARANTEE. we bought two. i told the dude at the store that this company had never met my dog dolby. he said, “keep the receipt!” it’s survived its first day!
• lise bought me the Complete Wreck (Series of Unfortunate Events, books 1-13) by Lemony Snicket for my birthday. this girl knows what i like!! and is it good? is it? IS IT??? ………YES!!
  
• graeter’s has a new seasonal ice cream flavor – chocolate coconut almond fudge. it’s season is over but apparently there’s still some floating around out there. go get some and try it! gosh, it’s good…
• it’s 1:30am and i ought to hit the sack. more substantial information, opinions and general rudeness coming soon. life gets busy and doggone it, i’ve got to prioritize!

i voted for judge dinkelacker because i thought his name was funny!

how pathetic and disappointing.

the children attending gallaudet kicked and screamed enough and bullied the administration to terminate the designated president of the university.

how sad.

read about it here.

“There are really just two possibilities for Sam Harris. Either he is right and millions of Christians, Muslims and Jews are wrong. Or Sam Harris is wrong and he is so going to hell.”

check it here.

everyone

must

go

out

and

purchase

the

JESUS PAN!

how else will you be saved?

many moons ago (oh, ok – maybe 7 or 8 years ago) i was told that i needed glasses. i began to notice at the tender age of 30 that around 9pm or so, the captions on the TV were getting blurry. reading at midnight wasn’t quite what it was before.

off i go to get glasses.

for those of you who know me, i don’t do well with excessive touching at times. my sensory input is messed up somewhere. it took 10 years of married life before i could handle wearing a ring. i still sleep in the buff because clothes keep me up at night. if, while i’m falling asleep, lise bumps me, i’m WIDE AWAKE and have to start all over again to get back to “falling asleep mode” (and woe to me if she’s restless that night).

so i get glasses. and i. hate. them. they…. sit on my face? they… get in the way? they drive me crazy.

i go back to the optician and ask for contacts. “sorry” i’m told – your prescription’s not bad enough for contacts. “what can i do?” i ask. “nothing. wear the glasses.”

so i took the glasses off and waited 4 years for my eyes to get bad enough to get contacts.

but recently i’ve given thought to trying glasses again if only to be able to take my contacts out before 1am.

and the result is…

jury’s still out. we’ll see. they’re a lot more comfortable and much less intrusive than the pair i got 8 years ago. may give them a spin at school tomorrow and see.

but i’ll tell you now: i don’t think i’ll EVER get over seeing the reflection of my eyes in the glasses….

good news as gallaudet continues to move more aggressively towards the spoiled children shutting down the campus – any congressional investigations launched yet?

i received an IM from a deaf studies major whose fiance is deaf asking me to show some respect despite my lack of support for gallaudet – my response was and is: “opinions are like buttholes – everyone has one and thankfully, we’re allowed to express em as we please. Gallaudet is a massive waste of space and money and is unable to carry out the “mission” they desire to carry out. it’s more of a cultural (if there were such a thing as a deaf culture) mecca. if it would stop pretending to educate, i’d be better able to stomach the institution. it’s not an issue of “respect” or “disrespect” – that would be the same as saying, ‘well, i don’t support the regime of Darfur, but there must be some innocents among them, so please continue your operations as always!’ some things need to stop.”
there doesn’t seem to be any intelligent conversation coming from students on this issue, but this is the kind of argument to expect: “She is not willing to come halfway,” said protest leader Delia Lozana-Martinez, saying Fernandes wanted to talk to the students only about opening campus. “It disappoints and disgusts me. I don’t think it was productive at all.” see, “halfway” doesn’t really mean halfway – it means “step down or else no deal” which would be…. all the students’ way?

more to come this next week, i’m sure.

it seems like some cooler heads actually DO reside on Gallaudet’s campus.

after all this time of cartoon education at Gallaudet, maybe this protest is just what is needed to shut the place down. if more people see things such as:

• children (er, students) telling administration what to do, then when not getting their way, stomping their feet and screaming, leaving little room for rational conversation…
• statements about, “the school’s low graduation rates, which have hovered for years around 40 percent”
• the confusion even among those who are tantrumming (er, protesting) about what the real issue is
• comments from students such as, “”Over the past week, we as students have felt like we live in a war zone”

…then maybe someone will start to ask the hard questions.

if the rest of the country (which supplies the majority of Gallaudet’s budget through our federal taxes) would do some serious investigating of what conditions of education at Gallaudet really exist, perhaps this special interest group (er, social mating ground, er, university) could be dissolved. if nothing else, criteria other than “qualifies for financial aid / will help us get more american tax dollars / can barely read or write (but that’s ok because they have a disability [oh crap, i forgot: that's not politically correct - let's say 'aurally challenged'])” might be revisited and maybe… just MAYBE standards would be raised.

while the deaf community and i are not friends (please don’t remind me that i’m wearing two hearing aids and without them i AM deaf) this is not a rant against deaf people. it’s against gallaudet university and the continuation of the coddling of deaf kids who need to realze that you don’t get to have life your way all the time – we live in a hearing world. you can go and play at deaf “college” for a couple years and drop out once you get your MRS degree, but there exists nowhere in the world the kind of insulated, pampered, babied community that exists at gallaudet. the earlier this is figured out….