rustypants speaks

for several years now, i’ve noticed the strange colored soda.

weird names. weird pictures. bottles. long-neck bottles.

and i’ve known people who swear by the sweet nectar tucked into those weirdly named long-neck bottles of pop.

but it wasn’t until our local grocery store had a sale on 12-packs of the canned stuff (3 for $9.00!) that we actually tried it.

and wow. nice.

green apple. lemon drop. root beer. all made with pure cane sugar, not the fake crap pumped into the usual brands.

and the tastes! interesting! different to be certain!

have we seen the light? are we converted??

yes.

i’m afraid so.

jones soda. the choice of generation rust.

one thing that has pissed me off for years is having Christians tell me and other christians:

• how to vote
• what music to listen to
• what music to NOT listen to
• what products to buy
• which TV shows / movies are acceptable to watch
• what books to stay away from

over the last few years it’s gotten to the ridiculous - boycott Disney, vote for Bush, brian mclaren is satan, 24 is a tool of the devil, real-christians-would-never-listen-to ________________, Harry Potter will send your kids souls to hell, etc. etc. etc.

recently the flap has been over The Golden Compass, a book and now movie written by Phillip Pullman. Pullman has made headlines over the fact that he is an atheist, a humanist, and his heroes in the His Dark Materials trilogy literally set out to kill God.

at least a half-dozen well-meaning Christians have told me not to read this trilogy and have spouted off ill-informed rumors about the author / book / movie designed to bolster their argument and thus save one more soul from eternal damnation.

“have you read the book?” is my question. “oh, my goodness, no!” has been the consistent reply. “but i heard about it from ______________ (insert name of relative here)” or “james dobson told me not to read it! so i’m not!”

i’m at the very end of the third book and here’s my informed assessment:

• pullman is a good writer. he’s crafted a well-written set of books that hooked me early in the first book and, except for a few short spots, has kept me hooked ever since.
• pullman has written these books for children / adolescents.
• adolescents can read these books with little trouble.
• children should not read these books.
• Christians can read these books without going to Hell.
• the heroes do, in fact, set out to kill God.
• God, being dead in a work of fiction, does NOT kill him in real life.
• adolescents who have been raised in a Christian family and who understand the features of fantasy in writing (and they should - this is a benchmark in every state’s elementary school writing / reading curriculum) can read this book without losing their faith.
• pullman seems to have more of a gripe with The Church (holy, Roman, apostolic), especially The Church of history, with its manipulations, killings, suppressions, etc. than he does with God. this doesn’t change the aim of the book - it’s simply an observation.

now, why shouldn’t children read this book? it’s a bit much - the imagery, the length, the subject matter. harry potter is better suited for younger children, and even that is a bit much depending on how young we’re talking. i’d say that 11-12 year olds could read pullman’s trilogy with some difficulty and much in the way of questions and needing support in understanding the events.

do i like His Dark Materials? yep. do i fear that his killing of God will kill my faith or kill Christianity? haha - nope. as stated many times before: my God is bigger than that and the faith of His followers is not so shaky that a work of fantasy is going to tank the life-changing reality of the message of His son.

and finally: shame on you, ill-informed, fear-mongering Christians who won’t read / watch / consider something that you fear goes outside of your own worldview! you MUST engage the world around you! you MUST read non-Christian literature! you MUST watch TV shows that challenge your faith! you MUST form your OWN opinion about things and not simply follow the herd! you MUST because this is what gets Christians in trouble: parroting with no basis in fact, making you simply one more of the brainwashed millions who fulfill the stereotype of thoughtless, conformist Christian faith - something of little or no actual world-changing substance. and this, my friends, goes against what your supposed leader taught and did.

she did it.

she found the proverbial “big one” - The Shell.

after my finding of The Other Big One back in december, lise’s pitched a bit of a fit that she’s not had the same luck. but last week, we hit the beach and there it was.

we had walked a ways down the beach together until at some point i decided to go back to the chairs and sit, watch the sunset and listen to the waves. lise trudged on, deciding to get in the chilly water and wade around a bit.

and that’s where she saw it. the top half of a large lightning whelk sticking up from the sand maybe 4′ from the shore. as she recounted the story, she said, “i saw it and i thought to myself, ‘oh, please let it be a whole one, not a broken one!’ as she pulled it out of the sand she let out a loud “YES!!” and bounded out of the water to examine her find.

it’s a nice one, too. where mine is 12″ and quite faded (not from the sun but because when they get to that size, the color becomes more of a flat cream with less pronounced ridges), hers is 7″ and full of colors and textured ridges! it’s a real beauty and is now proudly displayed as one half of the two Big Ones.

will this end her quest for another big one as it did mine?

probably not. who says chicks don’t care about size?

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it was 18 years ago today that lise said yes to my marriage proposal on the banks of the ohio river.

would i do it again?

like, duh!

i’ve gone for years surfing through musical phases that last anywhere from a few days to several weeks. i might get hooked on blues for a while, then abandon it all together for pink floyd, classical, or rap. jazz has always been a big one but even that comes in phases. all flavors of rock are acceptable, depending on the phase of my musical brain.

i’ve been teased for as long as i can remember for an insanely diverse taste in various genres of music and my 80gig iPod purchase 1 1/2 years ago was due in large part to my being tired of having to carry around 400+ cd’s in my car to keep from getting bored.

recently i’ve gotten stuck in a strange musical dichotomy phase.

my love of the grateful dead is no secret. back in junior high, i got the 3-LP Europe ‘72 album - it’s not the least indicative of a typical dead concert but the music was intriguing. psychedelic rock / bluegrass / folk / jazz / blues all wrapped into extended jam sessions = yummy music.

i’ve since acquired well over 60 bootleg concerts ranging from the late 60’s to around 1991. this is one of the phases i’m in right now, revisiting concerts and video of some 70’s and 80’s shows and just being in awe of their ability to make each show sound different, each song sound different, even after 20+ years playing the same tunes. their versatility impresses me and i’ve said for years that it’s awesome watching technically proficient musicians who enjoy playing together, playing together!

here’s a decent video of the dead in action back in ‘72.

my other current phase is about as far from the dead as you can get and still be in rock.

dream theater is a progressive metal band that’s been cranking out industrial strength speed / orchestral metal for 20+ years. i fall for bands like dream theater based on my early love of jazz fusion bands like return to forever - musicians who are stunning in their abilities individually, but then so in tune together that it seems they play as one. what makes this an unusual choice for me is that DT is VERY over-produced and sometimes almost comically melodramatic in their presentation. they’re tight, and not just because it’s packed together well in the studio: they are crazy tight in concert, too. but that progressive metal with melodramatic overtones gets up in my craw after a while.

and to be honest with you: i don’t really care for their vocalist. if there’s a weak link, he’s it.

but they have a killer “official bootleg” of their interpretation of PF’s Dark Side of the Moon that’s worth the price of admission.

this is a pretty good musical representation of dream theater laying down a track in the studio.

i can’t explain the strange phases i go through with music but i always know this: it’ll soon pass…

and next week it might be Jay-Z and Blind Lemon Jefferson. woo-hoo!

the email surprised me, i’ll admit. my reaction surprised me, too.

i thought the anger had passed. i really hadn’t thought about it in a while.

but last saturday it reared its ugly head again and i was left angry and speechless.

i received the following email that day:

it was one of the two pastors who screwed me over two years ago from impact church. and after that anger and bitterness passed, i laughed out loud at what the email was asking me to do.

“confirm that you are, in fact, friends with _____.”

and i thought about how “friends” don’t do what he did. how “christians” aren’t supposed to do what he did. especially in light of our extreme need of being ministered to during one of our most difficult times. and how no ministering was offered, only an offer of hush money to cover up their gross mishandling of the situation. and how i was allowed to come up with whatever lie i wanted to tell the church about why i “decided to leave” and they would parrot that to cover their asses, offering no chance of any reconciliation, only more lies and fabrication.

and after i laughed a bit, i thought about how surprised i am at the disappointment that still resides in me because of that situation. i lost a church family because of this guy’s mismanagement. i lost a trust that has always been fragile for me. my integrity was trashed in order to save his (and with the church’s money to keep it quiet).

dunno. the guy certainly has a pair, though.

today, at the top of an “enough! go-to-the-back-of-the-room and write-out-definitions-just-so-i-can-teach the students-who-give-a-rip” assignment:

“I can’t wait to go back to Mr. Harper’s class.”

to which there was only one possible reply:

amen, sister. amen.

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